A Love Story

On, January 2nd, I kissed my husband goodbye and left for the office. He had taken a few days off work to extend the holidays. We had lingered a while over lunch discussing plans for the New Year. We even dared to make plans to visit Michigan friends we had spoken of so many times through the years. It had been more than 20 years since our last visit with them. It looked like a northern trip might be a real possibility for the latter part of the year. What an exciting thought! One o'clock came all too soon and I started back to work to finish my day.

My thoughts of plans for the New Year continued as I walked into the office at the hospital. It looked liked a good year ahead and my husband and I were excited about it. I settled down to all the paper work I needed to clear before finishing up my day. Not so long into the afternoon, my busyness was interrupted by the page for Ambulance Services. I cringed to think that someone somewhere was in trouble. All too soon I realized the call had been from my son. After dispatch from the ER, Erick was connected with my office. "Mom, it's Dad! Hurry!" Erick had found his dad in the garage when he arrived home from work. The coroner ruled sudden heart attack. Life stood still. All plans were suddenly null and void. Dreams of vacations, retirement and grandchildren someday were snuffed out in a single moment.

The next year is still a blur. Friends and family offered comfort. Work at the hospital helped fill the days. Nights were long. Our three sons helped in their own way. But they were hurting too. Painfully and very slowly my hurt started to heal. As I began to come to grips with life, I realized I was part of a bigger plan. I knew life was not just about me. Every minute became precious to me. I began to look past the dreams my husband and I had made as a couple. Our lives had taken a different course. With family encouragement, I enrolled in school again and worked hard toward a degree in Psychology. I felt I must prepare for something. I was not sure what.

Days were long and hard, but I loved knowing my life was being guided by a higher power. Two years into my studies, in May of 1998, Emilie, my Michigan friend called to tell me of her cancer diagnosis. We kept in touch by cards and emails. In Sept., 1999, Emilie's suffering ended. Her husband, Richard, was ushered into his phase of sorrow. I had lost my friend.

Time passed. Work days and school night continued. Each time I thought of Emilie, I remembered our foursome. Emilie had spoken so many times of the deep love she and Richard shared. I knew first hand of the suffering he was going through. I felt compelled to email him words of encouragement that had been shared with me during my sorrow. Richard answered my email immediately, "Thank you for caring."

Our first emails slowly started renewing an old friendship. At first our correspondence was weekly, then daily, then several times a day. He wrote about Emilie's suffering. I wrote about family and school. We both wrote about memories from the past. An 1,100 mile distance gave us freedom to bear our hearts. We felt safe in sharing our life happenings, our dreams and our heart longings. John Powell, in his book, Why Am I Afraid To Tell You Who I Am, says, "To reveal myself openly and honestly takes the rawest kind of courage." Age had given us that courage and a boldness to be our true selves. No facades.We preferred honesty and openness to superficial babblings. This frankness on both our parts laid the foundation for a beautiful bonding. This bearing of our souls soon put a desire in our hearts to hear each other's voice. Emails no longer filled our need. Unlike so many years ago, we were both single now.We began to realize our friendship was changing. With Richard's first phone call, it was inevitable that sooner or later we would see each other again. I began to look forward to his phone calls. Then one day I heard the words, "Antje, I think I am falling in love with you, is that o.k.?" With that, I knew full time school and full time work would have to make way for a reunion. Once again my heart felt young and vibrant.

Our first time to see each other, after so many years, was filled with emotions. Richard brought letters I had written Emilie through the years. I had handfuls of pictures we had taken during happier times. Who could have every guessed we would read old letters together so many years later? Richard's eyes glistened as he wiped tears from my face. We looked into each other's soul, knowing we had both passed through a deep sorrow. We laughed with excitement thinking of the future. We sat for hours sharing memories. Time passed as we sat talking. Realizing I had lost tract of time, I hurriedly called home to Erick. "Where are you, Mom? You are late!" My, how the tables had turned!

Friendship turned rapidly to a deep abiding love. We were married a few months later with our four sons attending an outdoor ceremony. If there is anything better than being married to your best friend, we have not found it. We look back on our lives with amazement. We talk about all the decisions both our families had to make for our lives to cross. Only a higher power could have arranged such detail. We believe God smiled when the four of us shared our good times. He knew the future.